— OFFICIAL ORGAN OF THE OFFICE OF HORMUZ DEFENSE —

The Hormuz Herald

« Vegetables · Vigilance · Victory »
Vol. III  ·  No. 12 Wednesday, April 30, 2026 Three Cents
Time, you understand, has been unkind to the calendar; the Strait keeps its own hours.

The President last evening called upon every citizen of these United States to take up the spade and hoe in defense of the homeland, declaring in a fireside address broadcast from coast to coast that "every backyard from Bangor to Bakersfield must this season become a battlefront." With the Strait of Hormuz closed to commercial traffic for the eleventh consecutive week, and the price of a single pomegranate having reached the unconscionable sum of forty-two cents in some markets, the Administration has issued an urgent national appeal: Plant a Hormuz Garden.

The newly-established Bureau of Domestic Pomegranate, created by executive order on the third instant and headquartered in temporary quarters above a millinery shop on Pennsylvania Avenue, has set as its first-year objective the cultivation of twenty million Hormuz Gardens by the autumn harvest. Mr. Eustace P. Plumb, Acting Bureau Chief and a personal friend of the Vice President, addressed the assembled press on the steps of the Department of Agriculture and offered the following stirring words:

“The Strait is closed to our tankers, but it shall not be closed to our tables. Every spadeful of American earth turned this spring is an answer rung from the soil itself — an answer the Ayatollah cannot un-ring. Mrs. Homemaker, your trowel is a weapon. Junior, your watering-can is a torpedo. Let us all of us together fill the larder, and through the larder, the holds of our merchant marine.”

Bureau officials confirmed that planting bulletins, with diagrams suited to plots of as little as six square feet, will be made available without charge at any United States Post Office, County Agent, or Civilian Defense ward-station upon presentation of a Form 7-B and the citizen’s 1944 Ration Book. Particular emphasis is to be placed upon those varieties whose importation has been most cruelly interrupted: the pomegranate, the saffron crocus, the Persian mulberry, the cucumber, and that hardiest of patriots, the cabbage.

The Office of Hormuz Defense, in coordination with the War Food Administration and the newly-formed Civilian Cucumber Corps, will host enlistment drives this Saturday in 412 cities. Boys and girls of school age are warmly invited to pledge themselves to the Junior Hormuz Cadets — "Saffron in Every Sandlot" being the watchword of the youth division — and adults of all ages are reminded that the Crop Corps welcomes volunteers regardless of prior experience with the soil.

Critics of the program, what few there are, have been answered with vigor by Mr. Plumb himself, who reminded reporters that during the late conflict American Victory Gardens produced upwards of forty per centum of all vegetables consumed on the home front. "If our mothers could feed a continent with a window-box," he declared, his fist striking the rostrum with such force that two reporters were obliged to retrieve their pencils, "then surely we can feed a navy with a vacant lot."

Continued on Page Four, Column Two

Propaganda poster: Plant a Hormuz Garden — Our Pomegranates Are Fighting
Distributed gratis by the Office of Hormuz Defense. Suitable for posting in shop-windows, school-rooms, and church vestibules.

A Letter from the Strait

In which Ensign R——, aboard a vessel of the United States Naval Reserve, takes pen in hand to thank his mother for a particular jar of apricots.

PASSED BY
U.S. NAVAL CENSOR
STRAIT COMMAND
                                          Aboard the U.S.S. ████████████
                                          ████ days east of ███████████
                                          ██ April, 2026

  Dearest Mother,

  Forgive the late writing. The mail-bag came aboard at ████████
  on Tuesday last, and yours of the 9th was the very first letter
  drawn from it — the boys made me read it aloud, which I did,
  omitting only such portions as concerned Cousin Edna's troubles
  with her boarder, those being a private family matter and not, I
  thought, suited to the wardroom.

  The Mason-jarred apricots arrived intact. Not a one cracked, not
  a one weeping. Lt. ████████, who you will recall served with the
  Pacific Fleet in the late conflict, declared they were the finest
  preserves he had tasted since the autumn of '24, and pressed me
  for the recipe, which I gave him on the back of a signal-form. I
  hope you do not mind. He is a good officer and a hungry one.

  Tell Sis the saffron came through fine. Tell Father his tomato
  cuttings have not yet arrived but I have hope. Tell Mrs. Pemberton
  next door that her boy ███████ is well, in good spirits, and last
  Sunday won six bits at cards from a marine, which is the kind of
  detail I think she would like to hear.

  We are anchored ████ leagues from ████ ████, in waters which the
  Bureau in its wisdom has not seen fit to name. The galley has run
  through its onions. Your jars feed thirty men at a sitting. When
  this is over — and it shall be over, Mother — I shall come
  home and turn the south yard into a proper Hormuz Garden, and we
  shall not buy a tin of anything for the duration of my natural life.

  Your loving son,

                                                  ███████
                                          Ensign, U.S.N.R.
Propaganda poster: Dig for the Strait — Every Spadeful a Salvo
Issued by the War Food Administration in cooperation with the Bureau of Domestic Pomegranate.
FROM THE KITCHEN OF THE NATION

Mrs. Homemaker’s Persian Pickle Plot

Conducted weekly by Mrs. Eunice Homemaker, Domestic Editor — with the kind cooperation of the Bureau of Domestic Pomegranate.

Girls, a jar of pickles is a salvo all its own! When the Strait is closed and the spice-shelf is bare, what is a Mrs. Homemaker to do? She picks up her tongs, that is what. This week your Domestic Editor brings you a recipe so easy your Junior Cadet could put it up between schoolwork and his saffron plot — Mrs. Homemaker’s Persian Quick Pickles.

You will need:

  • Four (4) cucumbers, homegrown if at all possible
  • One-quarter (¼) cup vinegar  [Coupon B-3 — see your local board]
  • One (1) teaspoon salt  [No coupon required this week!]
  • Two (2) teaspoons dried dill, or a generous pinch of homegrown saffron threads
  • One-eighth (⅛) teaspoon sugar  [No coupon required this week!]
  • One (1) clove garlic, slivered (Mrs. H. uses two; she is a patriot)
  • One (1) clean Mason jar, sterilized in the manner described in Bulletin 14-A

Method. — Slice your cucumbers crosswise into rounds the thickness of a five-cent piece. Pack into the Mason jar with the garlic and the dill (or saffron). In a small enamelled pot, bring the vinegar, salt, and sugar to the merest simmer; stir until clear. Pour, while still hot, over your cucumbers. Cap, invert, and let stand on the kitchen sill for not less than three (3) hours. That is all there is to it.

Mrs. H. says — "If your husband should complain that the pickles are too sour, remind him gently that so is the blockade, and pass the bread."

Typographic poster: A Pomegranate in Every Pot
Office of Hormuz Defense, Bureau of Domestic Pomegranate — Form HD-9

CLASSIFIED ADVERTISEMENTS

Three cents per line. All trades subject to ration-board approval. Office of the Garden Warden, 14 Maple Street, second floor.
WANTED

Heirloom Persian Mulberry cuttings, six (6) or more, healthy. Will trade for one (1) diesel coupon, Class C. Apply Mrs. R. Henderson, 4 Elm.

FOR SALE

One (1) pressure canner, lightly used. Owner joining the Crop Corps and has no further need. Inquire at 22 Birch after six (6) o'clock.

LOST

Our boy’s enthusiasm for cabbage. Last seen in the vicinity of Sunday supper. Reward offered. Please return to 12 Maple Street.

HELP WANTED

Strong-back youth, 14–17, to assist with rooftop saffron plot. Two afternoons weekly, plus Saturday morning. Patriot rates. Apply Mrs. Henderson, 4 Elm.

FOR TRADE

Three (3) tin-coupons, will trade for two (2) burlap sacks or one (1) yard of cheesecloth. No reasonable offer refused. Box 14, this paper.

NOTICE

The Civilian Cucumber Corps will hold its weekly drill in Foster Park, Saturday, 0900 hours. Bring own trowel. Coffee and biscuits served afterward, by the Ladies’ Auxiliary.

WANTED

Compost, any quantity, will pick up. Patriot rates paid for grass-clippings, coffee-grounds, and apple-cores in good standing. Telephone Maplewood 7-2113.

FOUND

One (1) seed packet, marked “Black Persian Tomato” in a hand not the owner’s. Owner to identify by variety description. Office of the Garden Warden.

JUNIORS!

The Junior Hormuz Cadets seek a Pledge Captain, ages 8–12, of stout heart and clean fingernails. Apply at the School Plot Office, Tuesdays.

FOR SALE

One (1) Persian rug, slightly worn, will serve nobly as a garden border or kneeling-mat. Inquire 22 Birch. Will not separate.